Evangelical Christians Speak Out Against Un-Godly Fetishes

CINCINNATI, Ohio (IB) – While Jesus may have washed the feet of his disciples following the Last Supper, the Lord does not approve of sexualizing feet in the bedroom, according to America’s growing evangelical conservative movement. With the fall Congressional elections fast approaching, evangelical christians across the nation are positioning themselves to influence the politicians who are vying for public office to continue pushing the morality issues on their religious and political agenda.

Christian conservatives, while being consumers of various types of erotica and while engaging in marital sexual acts beyond intercourse in the missionary position, are setting their sights low this year. Specifially, they are looking to wipe out foot fetish erotica from adult bookstores, adult webistes, MySpace.com, other social networking sites, and from the bedroom. The right-wing religious group, Christians for Moral Sexuality, are targeting traditional conservative strongholds south-western Ohio and the entire state of Georgia for the launch of their “Feet are for Walking” campaign.

The “Feet are for Walking” campaign is designed to educate the public of the utilitarian nature of the human foot and to emphasize the non-sexual nature of this body part. Television advertisments for the campaign feature women in ’sensible shoes’, generic knee highs and pantyhose, and thick white socks. Stressing that feet were ‘created by God as our basic means of transportation’, the Christians for Moral Sexuality group hopes to reign in the growing foot fetish pandemic spreading across the world.

Most evangelical Christians view soft-core fetishes such as foot and nylon fetishes as the greatest threat to their takeover of the American political process. Fetishes that are considered benign by the majority of educated people unencumbered by the brain-washing of Bible Belt cowboy and Bubba churches with ‘men of the Lord’ preaching from stages with Christian rock bands backing them up give people a reason not to vote conservative. It seems that when the average evangelical Christian male develops an erection, the blood rushing to his penis from his brain finally permits him to think clearly and see that indulging one’s fetish for feet does not mean that he will be left behind at the time of the rapture.

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